I commited myself to this today.

Let the games begin!

If I had a bucket list... (Or, that moment when I get all reflective after reaching a big goal)

It's that time of year again—tea time! (Or at least, it is this week. No telling when the summer weather will return... again.) I pulled our tea pot out for the first time since... since we moved in, maybe? I can't remember ever running when the whistle sounded in this apartment until tonight.

Making tea or this fake cappuccino stuff always reminds me of the ten or so months I lived alone in W-B. At that point, I actually poured the water into a ceramic tea pot and brought it out to my living room, where I'd sip on it for hours while I worked and felt... utterly lonely instead of independent and accomplished.

As I sip my "cappuccino" tonight, I don't feel lonely. I am independent and I am accomplished. As of this past Saturday, I've checked another item off my bucket list—a list that doesn't actually even exist. Something I just mentally add to from time to time when I decide there's absolutely something I have to do—something I won't settle until I do.

This Saturday, I ran my first official 5k! Paid, registered, got a bib, received an official time, and didn't walk a step (though I did have to stop dead in my tracks when a little girl toddled out in front of me...... and when I almost tossed my cookies at the end during a sprint to the finish line). I didn't do as well as I wanted to (40:37... meh. I've done 37 minutes by myself), but figuring in the trappings of a head cold, an unexpected hill, a few annoying kids on scooters on the trail, and not training to my full ability the week before (because I was psyching myself out and making myself feel sick/injured)... I did well. I finished, which was my real goal.

(Pics below.)

Huge thanks for Michele for motivating me the whole way, whether I actually comprehended what she was saying or not. Not sure if I would've stopped and walked for a bit if she hadn't been by my side the whole time. <3

And huge thanks to Matt for making me feel guilty for even considering skipping my runs from time to time and for getting up at 8 on a Saturday morning to hold our bags while we ran. <3 <3

Before April of this year, I hadn't been able to run a minute without feeling like my heart was going to explode. These days, running a mile is a "quickie" and two miles is a "short run." Though I did reach my goal of actually running and finishing this race, it definitely won't be my last! I want to continue running outside at least three times a week (minus this week, while I'm just focusing on being able to breathe through my nose... head cold...), then train in the gym when it gets too cold. I'm already registered for a Color Run with Michele in Baltimore in November, so I want to beat my last time during that race if possible. Then after that... something more? Maybe when spring rolls around, I'll try to add a few more miles to my longer runs. Michele's convinced I'll be doing half marathons with her any day now, but I'd rather take it a bit slower. No need to get ahead of myself! ;)

So yeah... another goal, checked off the list! As I was talking to Michele this weekend, I was telling her that every time I accomplish something "big" that I had set my mind to (whether I had gotten the idea years and years ago, or simply two weeks ago), I feel this overwhelming sense of satisfaction. I've done all the things (but one), that I said I wanted to do recently. I moved to the city; I got a job in publishing; I'm publishing my first book to be sold nationwide (though it's not the one I had in mind...); I'm in a healthy, committed relationship; and now, on a whim, I've trained for a 5k and then ran one. (And, in the process, I lost all the weight I put on since Matt and I moved out here!)

I'm absolutely not going to be cocky and say that I feel I can do anything I set my mind to, but I definitely feel good about it. And I know that if there's something I want bad enough, I possess the drive to go out there and do it or get it. I can't make excuses; there are no excuses. I'm not going to say that this works for everyone, but, in general, if there's something you want to do... gather your resources, get in the right frame of mind, and just do it. (Thanks, Nike!) But seriously. Most of the time (though not all of the time), the only person holding you back is you. The only person who has ever held me back from anything I've wanted to do is me—regardless of who or what may have been influencing me at that moment, I'm the one who has made the decisions to give up, put things off, or simply go for it. I've known that for some time, but every time I check something off my "list," it's proof that I can focus and achieve the goals I set.

So with that, I'm on to another one...Yeah, I want to continue to run and race. Yeah, I want to lose more weight. Yeah, I want to get married, have a family, etc. But the next thing I'd really like to do is write the novel that's in me. I have the idea (I've had it since high school), but talking it over recently with a few people has really cemented it in my mind. So, Matt and my manuscript for our quote book is due on October 15. The following week, I'll commit at least one night a week to outlining, writing, or anything related to my ultimate goal. Don't know how long it'll take to finish, and I don't know what I'll do with it when it's done, but... if I want to be a writer... I suppose I should start writing again!

Dressed up for dinner at Matt's restaurant. I need a haircut!

Pre-race. Which one of us had more energy?

Pre-race friskiness. And I'm asleep. Because I haven't seen 8:00 on a Saturday morning in months.

Post-race. Someone's still energized...

... probably because my pace resulted in her almost walking those long legs for 3.11 miles

Results from the site!

Psst, 4/17 is Matt and my anniversary...

This is a bonus in the typical "Matt presses the button and neither of us are ready" fashion. You don't want to see the others. This is not our "official" annual Cowboys photo of the year. That's still to come. Stay tuned.